Smokey the Magnificent

Failing the Turing Test since 1986


Ahem! Fetal update: Pig number three is a boy. Miles is delighted; Rowan is bearing up very graciously, all things considered, and has already started patting my tummy and saying “How’s my little brother doing in there?”

Also relevant: pig number three is a terrifying mutant alien-child. The tech snapped this photo in great delight, saying “Oh look, it’s opening its mouth, and you can see the lens of the eye!” “That’s horrific”, I pointed out, and she giggled nervously. If I hadn’t just watched three seasons of The X-Files, thus priming myself against existential ghastliness, I probably would have leaped from the table and set fire to my own stomach.

I like to think the baby was saying “Hi Mummy! I wave my arm-stubs in a friendly fashion as my lone eyeball devours your soul!”

Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair:

Ultrasound Baby 3



  1. rbjaneite

    Also, not to be personal, but is there not a significant lack of matter in the brain cavity?

  2. Trish

    Your offspring is very freaky and makes me smile. I realise suddenly as I type this that I mean all three of them. I hope you are not offended.

  3. Trish

    It also looks like he is reading a book 🙂

  4. Krissy

    Is your website prettier?

    Yay baby! I confess that I feel more envy than is polite. I wanted a boy. I wanted boys. I would have done cartwheels over having three boys. I got two girls and a partner who says no more.

    Please post more about your children so I can live vicariously. I love boys so much.

  5. Smokering

    Much prettier! Helpdesk Man made it for me for Christmas. Click on Dennis the Quail-Bird.

    This is probably an unmaternal thing to say under the circumstances, but I don’t really get preferring boys. :p I mean, I like *my* boy specifically, but I find baby-to-preteen girls in general far more appealing than baby-to-preteen boys. (After that I’d bill both sexes as equally horrific for six years or so…)

    rbjaneite: A different view showed apparently normal brain matter; though it must be noted that the tech didn’t seem nearly as enthused about it as she did about the kidneys. It seems he has *marvellous* kidneys. Marvellous kidneys and an, I quote, “apparently normal” brain. Hmph.